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| This is not Billie Jean. But it's funny as hell! |
Victimized again by Rev. Donald Francis Gavan
By Terry Gavan
I am a confirmed hypochondriac.
I blame it on my upbringing and I pin it specifically on my uncle, the Reverend Donald Francis Gavan.
Gav was wildly cognizant of every working part of his slowly discombobulating body.
A chronic worrier.
A serial hypochondriac.
Now the medical definition of the disease states that:
“A person who has hypochondriasis, a disorder characterized by a preoccupation with body functions and the interpretation of normal body sensations (such as sweating) or minor abnormalities (such as minor aches and pains) as portending problems of major medical moment. Reassurance by physicians and others only serves to increase the hypochondriac's persistent anxiety about their health.”
The Reverend Donald Francis never actually took these minor complaints to his doctor.
He did however bring it constantly and continuously to his rather large extended family in Ottawa.
He was a constant presence at Saturday and Sunday Gavan family dinners.
His own hypochondria was enormously and prodigiously enlarged when confronted by other people’s maladies.
He was a “hypochondriac chart topper” taking extravagant and almost Rambo-like zeal in medical one-upmanship
If you had a cold … Uncle Don had the Asian Flu.
By Terry Gavan
I am a confirmed hypochondriac.
I blame it on my upbringing and I pin it specifically on my uncle, the Reverend Donald Francis Gavan.
Gav was wildly cognizant of every working part of his slowly discombobulating body.
A chronic worrier.
A serial hypochondriac.
Now the medical definition of the disease states that:
“A person who has hypochondriasis, a disorder characterized by a preoccupation with body functions and the interpretation of normal body sensations (such as sweating) or minor abnormalities (such as minor aches and pains) as portending problems of major medical moment. Reassurance by physicians and others only serves to increase the hypochondriac's persistent anxiety about their health.”
The Reverend Donald Francis never actually took these minor complaints to his doctor.
He did however bring it constantly and continuously to his rather large extended family in Ottawa.
He was a constant presence at Saturday and Sunday Gavan family dinners.
His own hypochondria was enormously and prodigiously enlarged when confronted by other people’s maladies.
He was a “hypochondriac chart topper” taking extravagant and almost Rambo-like zeal in medical one-upmanship
If you had a cold … Uncle Don had the Asian Flu.
